Let's Talk About Sex; Singles STAY AWAY! STRICTLY FOR MARRIED FOLKS

Paul Byerly



It is becoming increasingly common to hear of women who want sex more often than their husband does. In part, this is the result of a greater willingness to speak up about the problem, but there are other factors at play. Due to things ranging from stress to obesity to internet porn, a growing number of men are less interested in sex, less able to have sex, or unable to be aroused by their wife as they should.

There is one other cause of these problems that needs to be noted before we move on. If there is a significant ongoing problem between you and your husband, this can also harm his desire/ability to be sexual with you. Hurt feelings may continue even after something is resolved or buried, so past problems could be an issue too. If he feels you take him for grated, don't respect him, or expect unreasonable things from him, his sexual interest in you will be effected. If any of these are at play, the ideas here are a bandage on a lost limb – deal with the problem first, and then apply the ideas here if his sex drive does not return.

The reasons for a lack of male sex drive are many, and a checklist of sorts can be found in our Lack of Desire article. The purpose of this article is to give frustrated wives some practical ideas that may help them entice their husband to have more sex. If your husband is afraid that his sex drive makes him a monster, suffers from sexual guilt, or is concerned you don't really want or enjoy sex, these suggestions should either get him past his hang up, or create a crisis that will bring the hang-up to light. If your husband is suffering from a low sex drive, or is just too busy, these ideas may be effective. If your husband has fed on porn to the point he can’t be aroused by a real woman (any real woman, not just you), these ideas will likely not be of much help.

If these ideas don't help, you may have a serious problem, and it's probably time to seek help. Please note that sexual problems can be a warning sign of significant health issues; his primary care doctor needs to know about any change in desire or sexual function – it could literally save his life.

Because men have a wide variety of likes and dislikes, and a wide variety of sexual baggage, you should pick and choose from the things suggested here. However, don't assume you know what he will like, and don't assume his first reaction to something reveals his true feelings. If you want to precipitate a change, you're going to have to be bold and take some risks.

The male brain is wired a certain way when it comes to sex, and regardless of how strong or weak a man's drive is, his basic sexual wiring is the same. In a nutshell men like to see sex organs (breasts and genitals), and like to see those parts doing something.  Men also like variety. The idea here is for a woman to learn how to use these things to arouse her husband.

Before we start, you need to ditch any worries you have about not looking good, or being able to arouse your husband visually. First, realize that most women are far more attractive than they think. Second, realize that most men are not as into sexual perfection as you think. The looks of the average centrefold or porn star are icing on a cardboard cake. If you are going to look at a two dimensional image of something you can't have, you care about every little detail; but when you are having real sex with a real woman those things are not important. Third, realize that men are practical, the wife you have is better than the woman you don't have. To be blunt ladies, it's not what you've got, it's how you use and display what you've got. A woman who is overweight, flat as a board, or otherwise not up to some worldly standard of sexy, can easily drive her husband crazy with lust (it's okay for him to lust for you) if she knows how to do it. The biggest block to making this work is worrying about looking or acting silly. You have nothing to lose, so abandon shame and embarrassment, get in there, and turn your man on!

Don't wait until you want sex to start turning him on. For men arousal is a cumulative thing. Get a man turned on then walk away, and his conscious awareness of his arousal will fade, but his body and his mind have been primed. The next time he is aroused the response will be faster and stronger. Plan ahead, and work him up off and on over time rather than trying to get him going all at once.

All that said, here are a number of ideas. In some sections, I have listed a number of similar ideas to try to help you understand how his mind works. Once you understand his sexual mind, you will be able to come up with your own ideas.

Show him or make him think about your body

Nudity, hints of nudity, and making him think about your sexuality are good ways to prime the pump before you get him to bed. Some ideas to get you started:

• Lift your skirt for a couple of seconds to show him sexy panties, or no panties.


• Tell him that you are not wearing any panties. Whispering this to him in public is especially good.


• Go to the bathroom, remove your panties, and hand them to him when you come out. Again, this works especially well in public (be discreet).


• Buy (or make) panties that tie on the sides - you can untie and remove them discreetly.


• While in the car, remove your bra from under your clothes.


• In the car, lift your skirt or dress up high on your leg. When stopped at a light and sure no one can see, put his hand between your legs. A dress or skirt with buttons down the front gives a similar opportunity by undoing one or two buttons.


• Flash a breast at him at an isolated stop light.


• Wear a blouse or shirt that hangs open when you bend over, and flash him.


• Flash your panties, or lack thereof, by sitting across from him. Be sure no one else can see, but if you can pull this off in public, it will really affect him.

At home, you can be even more direct, especially if you have no kids around. Even if you have kids, you can find a moment here or there.

• Walk into the room naked from the waist up, or the waist down. Then do carry on as if you were fully dressed.


• Buy some really sexy lingerie (black or red, crotchless, a thong) and make sure he sees you put them on in the morning, or before you go out together.


• Serve him a multi course dinner. Each time you bring in a dish, be wearing one less item of clothing. By dessert, be naked.


• Serve him breakfast in bed wearing nothing but an apron.


• Without warning, while he is watching, lift your shirt, massage your breasts (getting your nipples erect) then lower your shirt and go on like nothing happened.


• Do some naked exercising. Stretching out naked is also good. Or tease him by doing it in just panties, or nothing but a tee-shirt.


• Take pictures of yourself naked, especially close-ups of your more sexual parts (Polaroid, or digital). Make sure they remain private between the two of you, but use them to add to his arousal. Put a picture on his dinner plate. Tape one to the bathroom mirror. Set one as the desktop for his computer, or make a series of them his screensaver (this only works at home, and if no one else will see it). Send them to his phone (make sure it won’t pop up and be seen by others).


• Buy some sexy, revealing, totally immodest clothes you would never wear in public, and wear them just for him. Second hand and thrift shops are great for this. The kind of provocative clothing worn when he was in high school is likely to be particularly effective, and dangerously high heels will get most guy’s attention.

Talk sex to him

What you say affect him. No doubt these sound corny to you, but try some and see what happens. By the way, most men are grabbed by "slang" terms, so if you don't have a problem using them in their sexual way, try it.

• "I've been thinking about your penis all day."


• "I was thinking about having sex with you, and now I'm all wet."


• "My mind keeps drifting... to your crotch."

READ THE PART 2 ONE WWW.OLATUNJISPEAKS.COM TOMORROW BY 10AM



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

OS BIOGRAPHY: Have you ever wanted to read Nelson Mandela's Biography?

[caption id="attachment_372" align="alignleft" width="300"] Nelson Mandela[/caption]

Nelson Mandela is a South African political activist who spent over 20 years in prison for his opposition to the apartheid regime. He was released in 1990 and was later in elected the first leader of a democratic South Africa in 1994. He was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize (jointly with F.W. de Klerk) in 1993 for his work in helping to end racial segregation in South Africa.

"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. "

- Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela in Details

Nelson Mandela was born in Transkei, South Africa on July 18, 1918. He was the son of a local tribal leader of the Tembu tribe. As a youngster Nelson, took part in the activities and initiation ceremonies of his local tribe. However, unlike his father Nelson Mandela gained a full education, studying at the University College of Fort Hare and also the University of Witwatersrand. Nelson was a good student and qualified with a law degree in 1942. During his time at University Nelson Mandela became increasingly aware of the racial inequality and injustice faced by non white people. In 1994, he decided to join the ANC and actively take part in the struggle against apartheid.

As one of the few qualified lawyers, Nelson Mandela was in great demand; also his commitment to the cause saw him promoted through the ranks of the ANC. In 1956, Nelson Mandela, along with several other members of the ANC were arrested and charged with treason. After a lengthy and protracted court case the defendants were finally acquitted in 1961. However, with the ANC now banned, Nelson Mandela suggested an active armed resistance to the apartheid regime. This led to the formation of Umkhonto we Sizwe, which would act as a guerrilla resistance movement. Receiving training in other African countries, the Umkhonto we Sizwe took part in active sabotage.

In 1963, Mandela was again arrested and put on trial for treason. This time the state succeeded in convicting of plotting to overthrow the government. However, the case received considerable international attention and the apartheid regime of South Africa became under the glare of the international community.

Mandela’s death sentence was commuted to life imprisonment and from 1964 –1981 he was incarcerated at Robben Island Prison, off Cape Town. In prison the conditions were sparse; however, Mandela was with many other political prisoners and there was a strong bond of friendship which helped to make more bearable prison conditions. Also, in prison Nelson Mandela was highly disciplined, he would try and study and take part in exercise every day. He later said these year of prison were a period of great learning, even if painful.

During his time in prison, Mandela became increasingly well known throughout the world. Mandela became the best known black leader and opposition to the apartheid regime. Largely unbeknown to Mandela, his continued imprisonment led to world wide pressure for his release. From the mid 1980s, the apartheid regime increasingly began to negotiate with the ANC and Mandela in particular. On many occasions, Mandela was offered a conditional freedom. However, he always refused wishing to put the political ideals of the ANC above his own freedom.

Eventually Nelson Mandela was released on February 11, 1990. The day was huge event for South Africa and the world. His release symbolic of the impending end of apartheid. Following his release there followed protracted negotiations, (often interspersed with tribal violence). However, eventually in April 1994, South Africa had its first full and fair elections. The ANC with 65% of the vote were elected and Nelson Mandela became the first President of the new South Africa.

"The time for the healing of the wounds has come. The moment to bridge the chasms that divide us has come. The time to build is upon us." - Nelson Mandela

As President, he sought to heal the rifts of the past. Despite being mistreated he was magnanimous in his dealing with his oppressors. His forgiving and tolerant attitude gained the respect of the whole South African nation and considerably eased the transition to a full democracy.

"If there are dreams about a beautiful South Africa, there are also roads that lead to their goal. Two of these roads could be named Goodness and Forgiveness.” - Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela retired from the Presidency in 1999, to be succeeded by Thabo Mbeki. Recently ill health has curtailed his public life. However, he does speak out on certain issues. He has been very critical of the Bush led invasion of Iraq. Speaking in a Newsweek interview in 2002, where he expressed concern at American actions, he said:

“I really wanted to retire and rest and spend more time with my children, my grandchildren and of course with my wife. But the problems are such that for anybody with a conscience who can use whatever influence he may have to try to bring about peace, it's difficult to say no.” (10 September 2002)

He has also campaigned to highlight the issue of HIV / AIDS in South Africa.

He is currently married to his third wife Graca Machel

Nelson Mandela was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1993 (jointly with F W De Klerk)



OS BIOGRAPHY is an initiative of OLATUNJISPEAKS.com; we intend to bring you inspiring biographies of people from around the world every week.

Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | BB PIN: 24D09CD1 | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

How to overcome shyness

How to Overcome Shyness



Shyness is a common trait among children and adults from all walks of life. Characterised by feelings of self-consciousness, self-criticism, and a reluctance to enter social situations, shyness has a negative impact on many aspects of a person’s life, including their relationships and career.

Even though it can feel crippling to some people, shyness is not a fixed state and you can take steps to overcome it.

Practice mindfulness

If you struggle with shyness, you might find yourself entering a cycle of self-criticism before you’re even conscious of it. Practice noticing the thoughts and feelings that come up when you think about entering into a social situation. Notice what your internal dialogue is saying and the judgements you are making about yourself.

As you notice, remember that these self-judgements are opinions, not facts. Just because you are thinking them doesn’t mean they are true. Practice distancing yourself from your anxiety and self-judgements using the phrase “I notice…” when describing how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking.

Set an intention for each interaction

Take some of the uncertainty out of each interaction by setting an intention for each conversation you enter. This might be an intention to really listen, an intention to find out more about someone, an intention to ask someone about particular topic, or anything else that is relevant to the situation.

Focus on other people in the conversation

A characteristic of shyness is self-preoccupation, which can create a vicious cycle: the more preoccupied we are with ourselves, the less likely we are to listen to others in the conversation, and the more likely they are to have a negative experience of us.

Focusing on others helps you distance yourself from self-judgement and be more present in the conversation.

Watch how other people interact

If you’ve avoided social situations for a while, you might worry that you’ve forgotten your social skills.

Watching how other people express themselves, converse, and socialise can provide you with a helpful template for your own interactions. Like focusing on other people in the conversation, studying other people’s social skills also prevents you focusing too much on your own feelings of self-consciousness.

Practice

As anxiety-provoking as the prospect might feel, the most effective step to overcoming shyness is to practice.

Although your first instinct might be to avoid social situations altogether, deliberately seeking out interactions with other people on a regular basis will help normalise social situations. The more you can enter interactions and social gatherings and leave in one piece, the more you will learn to trust yourself. Over time, the sense of fulfilment you get from these situations will replace the sense of fear you feel right now.

Remember that your first few practice attempts will feel hard. You won’t overcome your shyness overnight and it might be tempting to quit along the way. If you can stick with it, however, it will become easier over time.

Develop your self-compassion

Combat the self-criticism you experience by exercising your self-compassion muscle instead. As soon as you become aware of your inner critic, practice finding ways to empathise with yourself and your situation.

The more you can practice self-compassion, the more natural it will feel to exercise self-compassion when you’re feeling anxious and self-conscious. This helps stop the self-criticism spiral and prevents you from becoming focused on your own shortcomings instead of focusing on the interaction. It also makes you a better conversation parter, as when you can extend more compassion to others, they will have a more positive experience of you.

Prepare for interactions

If you’re worried that you’re not going to know what to say to someone, then prepare for the conversation in advance. Brainstorm a list of suitable topics you can ask the other person or people about and talk about yourself.

Get support

If you’ve been struggling with shyness for a while, you might not have a huge support network, however support is very important.

Whether it’s a friend, a family member, a colleague, or a professional, finding someone who will offer you compassion and support as you overcome your shyness will make a positive difference to your experience.



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

#Singles&Married; 6 Things Every Couple Needs to Know

By Angel Chernoff



If your relationship with your partner doesn’t feel as healthy and happy as it once did, there’s a good chance you both need to STOP…

1.  Being too busy to be present with each other.

The best gift you can give someone you love is the purity of your full presence.  Presence is complete awareness, or paying full attention to “the now.”  If you do not find at least some amount of presence in the moments you share with your partner, it is impossible to listen, speak, compromise, or otherwise connect with them on a meaningful level.

To cultivate your presence, all you need to do is sit quietly for as long as you desire and put your full attention on your breath – thinking only of what each inhale and exhale feels like.  Don’t judge or resist your inner-workings

2.  Feeling too comfortable to compliment each other.

The secret to a healthy, lasting relationship is not about how many days, months, or years you’ve been together, it’s about how much you truly love each other every day.  You must directly express this love through your words and actions.  It seems like such a small thing, but in our busy lives we often forget that a kind word, a helping hand, or just a smile and a quick “thank you” can create a bright spot in your partner’s life.

Relationships last a lifetime only when two people make a choice to keep it and work for it.  Tell your partner you love them every night, and prove it every day.  These acts of love don’t need to be extravagant; they just need to be true.

3.  Resisting compromise.

Good relationships don’t just happen, and they aren’t built solely on a foundation of convenience.  They take time, patience, effort, and two people who want to be together and are willing to meet in the middle.  When there’s a disagreement, they work out a solution that works for both parties – a compromise, rather than a need for the other person to change or completely give in.

Ultimately, love is when another person’s happiness is equally as important as your own.

4.  Wanting to be right.

When it comes to closest relationships, you don’t always have to be right; you just have to not be too worried about being wrong.  Ask yourself, “Does it really matter?”  Oftentimes it’s far better to be kind than to be right.

Express your opinions freely and politely with your partner, remembering that if your purpose is to ridicule or prove them wrong, it will only bring bitterness into your relationship.  Respecting their opinion, without judging or jumping to conclusions, always carries more weight than being right.

5.  Hiding personal flaws and problems from each other.

You attract a person by the qualities you show them, you keep them around based on the qualities you truly possess.  Problems and flaws are a part of everyone’s life.  If you try to hide them, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to truly know you and love you fully.

As flawed as you might be, as out of place as you sometimes feel, and as lacking as you believe you are, you don’t have to hide the imperfect pieces of yourself from your partner.  They see your flaws as features that make you interesting, and they see your problems simply as a sign that you’re human too.

6.  Trying to get even, as a replacement to forgiveness.

You don’t forgive your partner because you’re weak; you forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that human beings make mistakes.  Forgiveness is giving up your craving to hurt them for hurting you.  It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened.  It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move forward with your life… and hopefully move forward with your relationship too.

Afterthoughts

The greatest relationships take a great deal of work.  They don’t just happen, or maintain themselves.  They thrive only when two people make an effort and take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their heads and hearts.

Keep in mind that every couple has ups and downs, every couple argues, and that’s the way it should be – you’re a partnership, and partnerships can’t function without regular communication and compromise.  When you don’t talk it out, there’s a lot of important stuff that ends up not getting said.

And, above all, remember that it’s not all about you.  There is greatness in doing something you dislike for the sake of someone you love.

Your turn…

What relationship mistakes would you add to this post?  What should every couple stop doing to each other?  Leave a comment below and share your thoughts with us.



Source: MarcandAngel.com



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

The one thing successful people do every day

By William Arruda



We’re all busy. We all have infinite to-do lists that fill up faster than we can cross off the most urgent tasks. Being busy makes you feel productive, but it could be getting in the way of your most important project: YOU.

“Busy” is the most common reason people give me for not doing anything to build their brand so they can advance their career.  They make time for emails and meetings and teleconferences, but they don’t capture the true benefits of all those activities. Working in their career is getting in the way of working on their career. Sound familiar?

Well, here’s the one personal branding habit you can’t be too busy for.

Document your wins. What’s the easiest way to do that?  Keep a job journal.

Why? When you take a minute to jot down the day’s achievements, you:

1. Acknowledge what makes you great. Your team members and clients are too busy to notice your daily victories, so it’s important to take a brief moment for self-congratulations. It’s a great confidence builder, and it helps you quantify and assess your strengths. Don’t forget to record the seemingly small triumphs, even the personal ones (“met the deadline despite cranky vendors … stayed calm under pressure!”).

2. See the difference between meeting goals because of motivation and meeting goals despite burnout. If you take an extra 90 seconds and record not only what you achieved, but how it felt to accomplish the task, you’ll get a great reality check. You’ll realize which activities and co-workers make you happy and which ones fill you with dread. This self-awareness is critical as you decide where you want to go with your career. It’s not just about “doing,” it’s about doing the things that energize you. This will also help you know when to take action, giving priority to the projects that will have the greatest impact for your career, your team and your company.

3. Get a clear picture of the kind of work you are doing. Do you find yourself in leadership roles? Are you perfectly content to execute someone else’s plans? Which types of projects do you prefer? Are you repeating an inefficient process over and over?

4. Shine during your weekly or monthly team meeting with your boss. You can speak clearly and articulately about all you accomplished in the prior week or month, and you’ll be the one with the latest facts when it’s time to deliver a progress report.

5. Easily prepare a dazzling portfolio for your annual review – the one that’s tied to your bonus and promotion! If you’ve written them down, you’re not going to forget those great things you did in January when you get to your annual review in December.  At the end of the year, you’ll have a complete list of accomplishments – approximately 260 entries. You can go through the list and highlight, sort, combine – whatever suits your style. And you’ll have a competitive edge, because you’ll have well-organized evidence. Instead of a vague conversation, you can have a full-blown presentation that showcases all the times you saved the company money, brought in business, made customers happy, and otherwise saved the day.  If you’re invited to interview at another organizations, these materials (except confidential ones, of course) translate into a great career-marketing portfolio. If you’re in business for yourself, a job journal is even more essential because it can enhance your pitch.

So how do you do it? Follow these three steps:

1. Choose a consistent place and time of day. The job journal should become one of your favorite habits.

2. Until it becomes a habit, add it to your do-list or calendar. It’s an important activity that deserves to be a high priority in your life.

3. Do it. While we were writing Ditch. Dare. Do!, my co-author, Deb Dib, and I prepared a wins worksheet designed specifically for recording your wins. It’s a fillable PDF that you can add to every day. Download your worksheet and get busy on your real work.



Source: Forbes.com



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

THE OLAMIDE SCHOOL OF STREET CREDIBILITY - 5 ways to become anauthority in life and in business

By Kehinde Ajose





I just want to remain on top of my game. I know I have what it takes to run the show for as long as God permits me. But time will tell. I am growing by the day and I am enjoying every bit of my moment in the industry” - Olamide

I have met a lot of people like you who have got it going on….filled with vigor, incredible vision, cute business ideas   and ready to change the world, but are sadly not living on life’s hall of fame. They are like me when I started out blogging. I have decided to lay it bare and tell you the truth   in this piece. When I started out as a blogger, I just had the passion to share my expertise with people without learning the rudiments of blogging. Then something changed. I got my eureka moment when I deliberately started studying successful bloggers and what makes them tick, like a musician would study the music greats in his field.



Let me ask you a question? Do you think people would pay Olamide #100,000 to fix the pot-holes on their streets? Of course they would. Because he is Olamide! Nobody cares if he knows about fixing street pot-holes as long it’s Olamide. A lot of people would pay simply to have him hangout with them. They’d pay because he is famous and fame makes us like people. If those likable people have products and services, we would love to patronize them.

You want to win in business, have street credibility like Olamide and become an authority in your field, and then you’ve got to play the game like Olamide spits punch lines in his raps. Now your goal as an entrepreneur, or whatever you are isn’t to grace the cover of Forbes magazine.Your goal is to become famous in your craft; like the Linda Ikeji’s of blogging, the Genevieves of Movies, and the Tuface’s of music.”Famous” doesn’t have to mean flashbulbs, Paparazzi, and being married to Kim Kardashian. In this case, it can mean a modest amount of recognition in your field. You want to be just famous enough that when people who are interested in your niche talk amongst themselves, your name pops up…And when it does; others in the group will nod and say: “Oh yes! I know him; he is an authority on interior decoration” or whatever your expertise is.

To make this happen for you, you need to;

• Build Your Own Tribe

According to Seth Godin, a tribe is a   group of people connected to an idea. In clear terms you need to have your own fans. Fans are fanatical about the things they love. This is what “Fan” is short for. Fans tell everyone about you. Have you tried having an argument with a diehard Olamide fan on Twitter? It usually ends in a “Tweetfight”. Every successful artiste has fans; Dbanj has fans, Tiwa Savage has fans, Wizkid has fans. People don’t just listen to their music, they form attachments to them. People don’t just say, “I listen to Olamide”. They say: “I like Olamide”. They tell their friends about Olamide, and those friends tell their other friends and suddenly a street wise kid from Bariga passionate about the streets becomes a celebrity. Little wonder he has over two hundred thousand followers on Twitter. If you want to become renowned in your business niche, you have to lose sight of seeing it as a business and start thinking of it as a stage. Yes, A stage.  Stop thinking of your products and services as a medium to reach your customers or clients only; when you are out there in the business stage, see yourself in the light of Olamide, a superstar who is going out there to wow the crowd (customers and clients). Be sensational.



He calls himself Badoo- “Baddest Guy Ever Liveth, YBNL, Young Erikina…”

• You’ve got to Differentiate or Die

Olamide always tells anyone who cares to listen that he is not a regular rapper. He is cut from another coat. He is not just different, he is the difference. How do you differentiate yourself from the maddening crowd in your business?

• Authenticity

Olamide has no issues with letting his genuine fragility and past experiences bleed through his verses. His honesty and street credibility connects him to his audience in a way that can’t be manufactured. They see him as one of them and one from them. In his words, ”Everybody knows my story or let me say I try to make people know my story with the way I sing .When I compose my song I always try to bring my rough days into retrospect. I remember how I waited for many years for my singles to be promoted. I always sing about the story of my life in my songs”

Your originality and open mindedness will not only take you far in business, it will make you go far in life. Your authenticity is the autograph that separates you from the pack.

• Keep evolving

Heavy repetitions and little innovation lead to diminishing returns. From ‘Eni duro’, Voice of the street,  Omotoshan, Durosoke, to Yemi my lover’, Olamide is dedicated to upping his game. He sees it this way; “I am an ambitious young man .I love to always push myself to the limits we have a lot going on in the industry right now that will make you sit tight and buckle up.” As an artiste or entrepreneur it is important to keep grooming yourself and growing your game. No matter how good you are at what you do, you’ve got to keep growing. Never rest on your laurels. Little wonder the baddest guy ever liveth Olamide was the biggest winner at the Nigeria Entertainment Awards 2013 edition (NEA).

• Sell what people want to buy

The key here is not just to tell a story, but to tell a story people want to hear. It’s not just about writing another song but a song that can resonate with the audience. It’s not enough to release another product, but releasing a product that connects with the needs of your customers. That is the key to success in business. Passion isn’t just enough. You can be passionate about your new cute product, but it might not resonate with what the market needs. Olamide is a master when it comes to using his street credibility to connect with his fans. He blends punch lines, slang, and analogies that create that wow factor in the hearts of his fans. You should do that too.

Embrace the greatness within you. You too can replicate this success story in your life and business. You are a star. Admit it. “Celebritize you” .Go out there and strut your stuff.



Kehinde Ajose is a publicist, blogger, and a talent development coach who helps individuals to discover and develop their talents in order to become iconic brands. Follow him on Twitter - @splendidkenny. He blogs from http://KehindeAjose.com



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS |  www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

Oprah Winfrey: 20 Things Everyone Should Master by Age 40

By Oprah



How to Delegate

1. Make certain the people around you have good values, good judgment, and are loyal. Allow them to impress you but be sure they’re comfortable coming to you for feedback. Most important, hire people smarter than you!—Ivanka Trump, executive VP, Trump Organization; principal of Ivanka Trump fashion and accessories lines

2. How to Comfort Someone

We’re a block from a hospital, so in my 31 years here I’ve met many people who’ve just received bad news. If you see someone in distress, don’t hesitate to talk to them. Once you’ve heard their story, sometimes all you have to say is “I’ll be thinking of you.” Your words are more powerful than you think.—Jimmy Vecere, bartender at 12th Street Irish Pub, Philadelphia

3. How to Have More Fun Having Sex

Sex researchers have found that one of the biggest turn-ons for women is feeling desired. So believing that you’re desirable is key. Choose a part of your body you admire. It might be your eyes, your hari, the curve of your calves. Now focus on that part in your mind and “see” it as your partner would see it. It may feel silly, but imagine he’s thinking, “Wow, I want her so bad.” And remember: You don’t have to wait until you’re in the mood. Sometimes you just need to get started and the mood will follow.—Gail Saltz, MD, author of The Ripple Effect: How Better Sex Can Lead to a Better Life

4. How to Spot a Good Opportunity

A lot of people ask me how I knew Mad Men or Breaking Bad would make great TV. I knew because when I read those scripts, I felt something. I didn’t do any market testing or focus groups—I just asked myself, Would I want to watch this? When you’re weighing an opportunity, make the question that simple: “Do I really want this, or am I doing it for the money or the prestige or because I think I should?” It can’t just be about those things. It has to make you feel good, too. And by the way, if opportunities aren’t knocking, you can make your own. When I was looking for work several years ago, I took everyone I knew in New York, where I’d just moved, to dinner or drinks or tea. I explained that I was open to anything. Six months later, one of those dinner dates called about a possible job at AMC. If I hadn’t put myself out there, that never would have happened.—Christina Wayne former senior VP at AMC, current president of Cineflix Studios, and an executive producer of the new BBC America series Copper

5. How to Make Conversation at Parties

First, get a drink. If it’s a cocktail, it’ll loosen you up, but even if it’s just club soda, it’s good to have a prop to hold if you’re feeling nervous. Next, approach someone—a person, not a group—and ask how he or she knows the host. After that, be authentic and interested and ask questions, and others will float over and join in. A good host will have considered the mix of people, so when you arrive, ask, “Who should I meet?” Most important: Even if you won’t know anyone and you’re feeling intimidated, you must go. Do not stay home. So many people are afraid that no one will talk to them and they’ll leave feeling awful—but has that ever happened to you? Me, neither. Usually I end up laughing and eating and drinking and making friends, and that’s what it’s all about.—Marjorie Gubelmann CEO of Vie Luxe and society hostess extraordinaire

6. How to End a Friendship

Be clear that you need distance, but avoid getting into specifics. You might say, “I’ve realized I need to take a break from our friendship. I have so much going on in my life right now, and I need to take more time for myself.” Now isn’t the time to try to change your friend or teach her a lesson. (If you believed you could see things the same way, you wouldn’t be breaking up in the first place.) Above all, be sure you want to break up. It’s unlikely you’ll ever be able to return to the same level of intimacy.—Irene S. Levine, PHD, author of Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend

7. How to Stay in Touch

I don’t often get to see or even talk to my closest friends from various stages of life (including the 16 who were my bridesmaids). But I stay connected with them—and the thousands of others in my BlackBerry. The key is managing your friending: The more organized and accessible your friends’ information, the easier it is to stay in touch. So you have to set calendar reminders for birthdays (I do it for anniversaries, too), and keep your address book up-to-date. And when someone pops into your mind, let them know, even if it’s just with a “Thinking of you” text. Don’t let the moment pass; treat it as a reminder to reach out.—Alexandra Wilkis Wilson, cofounder of the five-million-member Gilt Groupe; keeper of 16,500 BlackBerry contacts

8. How to Not Sweat the Small Stuff

The thing that’s grand about spending your time thinking about the universe is that it makes you feel insignificant. I don’t mean that in a bad way. If you understand that we’ve now discovered entire solar systems that contain planets similar to Earth, and that those are just the ones we know about, since most of the stars we’ve looked at are within about 300 light-years of Earth and the distance to the center of our galaxy is nearly 100 times that—then you realize that the laundry you’ve left undone and the dumb thing you said yesterday are about as significant as slime mold.—Alyssa Goodman, professor of astronomy, Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics

9. How Not to Embarrass Yourself at Karaoke

Warm up all day. Start by counting aloud when you wake. Later, laugh out loud; we laugh higher than we talk, so you’ll be activating your upper register.Lubricate your voice, especially if you’re nervous (stress can dry out your vocal cords). Half an hour before you sing, eat a little bread soaked in olive oil.Breathe from your diaphragm. You’ll generate the air you need to produce a melodious tone. Inhale through your nose and push your belly button out. Exhale and let your navel go back in.Feel free to change keys. Even the pros sing in a lower register when their voice gets tired.Sing with joy, from your heart, and no one will care how you sound.—Debra Byrd, vocal coach for The Voice and vocal producer for The Next: Fame Is at Your Doorstep

10. How to Make New Friends—at Any Age

I tell my patients, “Food, alcohol, and drugs are no substitute for a relationship.” If you’re lonely, do something about it. If you love the arts, take a course at your local community college. And if you can’t find a place to get involved, create one. Besides seeing patients several times a week, I’m thinking about starting a group where immigrantsand refugees can talk about their feelings. It’s important to be part of a community!—Hedda Bolgar, 103-year-old practicing psychoanalyst and cofounder of the Hedda Bolgar Psychotherapy Clinic, in Los Angeles

11. How to Forgive Yourself

You have to find a way forward. You can say, “I’m going to work to improve myself so I never hurt another person that way.” And then you need to atone, to make the lesson you learned mean something. Do this, and you will be able to look in the mirror again.—Jennifer Thompson, rape victim whose testimony sent the wrong man to prison for ten years

12. How to Tell a Secret

Find someone who revealed something similar and survived, and talk to them about how they did it. No matter what your secret is, someone out there shares it.Make sure the first person you tell will accept you and your secret—you don’t want to take a risk right away.Be short and sweet. All I had to say to get my point across was “Dad, I’m gay.”—Randy Phillips, airman and formerly anonymous video blogger who came out to his dad after the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

13. Simple Ways to Look Polished

Start with a great haircut, neat nails, and well-shaped eyebrows (if eyes are the windows to the soul, eyebrows are the frames). Invest in a tailor—and in a few no-fail items that will help you look pulled together: a crisp white shirt, a pencil skirt, a great-fitting shift dress (just add shoes and go!), a tissue-weight scarf, and the perfect jacket. Whether it’s a black blazer with a structured shoulder and nipped-in waist or a little leather jacket that looks great over anything, the right jacket projects confidence. And isn’t that what polished really means?—Adam Glassman, O creative director

14. How to Let Go of Anger

Anger is like a storm rising up from the bottom of your consciousness. When you feel it coming, turn your focus to your breath. Breathe in deeply to bring your mind home to your body. Then look at, or think of, the person triggering this emotion: With mindfulness, you can see that she is unhappy, that she is suffering. You can see her wrong perceptions. You can see that she is not beautiful when she says things that are unkind. You can also see that you don’t want to be like her. You’ll feel motivated by a desire to say or do something nice—to help the other person suffer less. This means compassionate energy has been born in your heart. And when compassion appears, anger is deleted.—Thich Nhat Hanh, Buddhist monk and author of Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames

15. How to Say Goodbye to a Loved One

First and most important: Meet the dying person where she is. She may be in denial, and denial is a fabulous crutch. You don’t pull a crutch out from under somebody. Try to validate the feelings behind the denial. So imagine your aunt says, “Let’s reserve a house at the lake this summer. I loved the weeks we used to spend there.” You don’t rush out to make a reservation; you reminisce with her about those good times. She’s living in memories much kinder than her reality.But let’s say she tells you, “You know, I’m not going to live much longer.” The door’s open. Be honest, direct. Tell her you hate that this is happening. Tell her it mattered that she was here. Tell her how she enriched your life, that she won’t be forgotten. This is no time to pussyfoot. For God’s sake, don’t tell her she looks great, or that she’ll pull through. Pretending creates a chasm of loneliness for the dying. Can you imagine if you were in labor, and no one in the room would acknowledge that you were giving birth?Toward the end, dying people tend to withdraw. You know how when you drop a pebble in a pond, the rings ripple out? For a dying person, the rings go in. It doesn’t matter what’s happening in politics or sports or the next room. Eventually all that matters is I’m hot. I’m cold. I love you. Do you love me? At that point, all that’s required is your presence. Be quiet. Put your hands on hers. That’s it.—Maggie Callanan, hospice nurse since 1981 and coauthor of the celebrated book Final Gifts

16. How to Know When to Quit

After my first book was published in 2000, I spent two and a half years writing a novel. But it never felt right. I didn’t even name it—it was the poor, misshapen beast child I kept hidden under my bed. Then I showed it to my agent. “None of the things you do well are in evidence here,” she said. I was devastated, then relieved: I had failed, and now I could stop. If you don’t feel a shiver of excitement or fear, if there’s no emotional risk involved, let it go. You can’t discount how hard it will be to leave your bad marriage or stop writing your bad book, but if you’re unhappy, nothing can get better as long as the status quo stays the status quo.—Elissa Schappell, author of Blueprints for Building Better Girls

17. How to Listen Better

Start by doing everything you can to fire up the “mirror neurons” in your brain, which mimic what others are experiencing. You can subtly imitate the other person’s posture, even match the pace and depth of their breathing. Your words can also mirror what the other person is telling you. For example, you might say, “What I’m hearing is that it distresses you when your husband wears his tiara in public” or “Wow, I can tell just from your voice that you’re under serious pressure.” Don’t add advice or commentary—just reflect. If you simply must add something, ask the speaker to disconfirm what you say. In other words, ask to be told where you’re mistaken—and mean it. “I’m thinking it’s not so much that you’re embarrassed as that you want a tiara of your own—am I wrong about that?” Do not ask to be told that you’re right; it turns a listening ear into a bid for authority, and no one will want to talk to you then.—Martha Beck, O’s resident life coach and author of Finding Your Way in a Wild New World

18. How to Get Past Emotional Pain

Everything we experience—no matter how unpleasant—comes into our lives to teach us something. To move on from something difficult, look for the lesson. Start by asking yourself: “If this is the way things are supposed to be, what can I learn from it?” Think about how you may have contributed to the painful experience, or if there was anything you could have done to prevent it. Often we don’t realize the lesson because we’d rather avoid reliving the pain. But once you allow yourself to reflect on the sadness, anger, guilt, or shame you’ve been hiding, those feelings will begin to subside. Yes, someone hurt you. Once you’ve forgiven them and let go, you can move forward and begin creating the life you desire.—Iyanla Vanzant, host of OWN’s Iyanla, Fix My Life

19. How to Buy Great Wine

See if an expensive wine’s producer also makes a value bottle—it’s likely to be crafted with the same care.Serve wine with food from its region. For pasta, look to an Italian bottle. For paella, go Spanish.If all else fails, try Malbec from Argentina, Merlot from France, Pinot Grigio from Northern Italy, and Chardonnay from Australia. Pinot Noir pairs with almost anything. And you can’t go wrong with bubbly.—Sheri Sauter Morano, Institute of Masters of Wine

20. How to Laugh at Life

The tap water hits a spoon in the sink and sprays you. You pull a window shade and it just keeps going and going. You can’t roll up a garden hose in any dignified way. You have to become a connoisseur of these events—”Wow, look at that, that’s great.” You have to hope that a higher power is saying, “That was a good one!” And that you’re sharing the divine pleasure it’s taking in your misfortune.
—Ian Frazier, author of The Cursing Mommy’s Book of Days

——————————-

Read this article in Oprah



Follow us on Twitter: @OLATUNJISPEAKS | www.facebook.com/OLATUNJISPEAKS

5 winning habits of successful people - do you have them all?

Vincent of Health Money Success



Successful people and winners fascinate me. I always wonder what makes them so different from others. Therefore, I read books about successful people and try to observe what are the winning habits that they have. Here are the five of them that I had discovered.

1. They have an end in mind

You feel lost when you do not have a destination to move towards. People who achieved great success have an end in mind. They know what they want and they commit themselves to achieve it.

When you have a goal, you have something to focus on. If you do not have a goal, you will be wandering around feeling lost. Having an end in mind can help guide you towards your destination.

2. Have a reason

Having an end in mind is only one part of the story. Winners have a reason behind their goals. They know their purpose behind achieving their goals.

The journey towards your goals is full of obstacles. Most people gave up half way because they lack reasons behind their goals. However, those who have strong reasons behind their goals have higher chances to move past those obstacles.

The likelihood of giving up is drastically higher if you do not have reasons behind your goals. If you have a goal to lose 20 lbs but lack reasons behind it, you will find it hard to achieve this goal. However, if you have a strong reason such as you want to lose 20 lbs in 3 months time because you want to look your best during your wedding ceremony, the likelihood of losing weight is much higher.

When you have a compelling reason to support your goals, you drastically increase the possibility of achieving it.

3. Have a support group

It is easy to give up when you are alone on this journey. Form a support or mastermind group to help you along the way.

To form your own support group, find like-minded people who want to achieve similar goals. Keep your group small with only two to six people. You need to choose your members carefully. Choose members who are positive, goal oriented and are pursuing similar goals to yours.

If you do not know where you can find your own support group, try out MeetUp.com or related forums to what you are doing (fitness forums, personal development forums etc).

4. They are particular about how they spend their time

If you do not know how you spend your time, you will waste most of your time away. Time is one of our most precious resources. You can waste your money and still manage to earn it back but there isn’t any way for you to get back your time if you waste it away.

You have to be aware of how you spent your time. If you want to achieve your goals but you are spending 70 percent of your time watching TV and hanging out with friends, most likely you will not reach your goals.

Keep a time log. There are many mobile and web-based applications that can help you track where you are spending your time. Rescue Time is a great web-based app that can help you track what you are doing on the computer and how much time you spent on each different site.

Use your preferred time log to get a clear picture of how you are spending your time and make the necessary adjustments. If you are serious about changing your life and achieving your goals, spend more time on the essential tasks instead of time wasters.

5. Try fast, fail fast, keep trying and never give up

It is hard to hit the target with your first try. This is why winners try fast, fail fast, keep trying and never give up. There are many things that you don’t know how to do it and trial and error is one of the ways to help you pick up new stuff.

You can learn faster by trying faster and failing more times in a shorter period. You learn at a slower pace when you are too slow to take action. When you take action to try fast, you will learn at a faster rate and know what things work and what don’t.

You can make the necessary adjustments along the way to make things right and move closer to your goals. If you are slow to take action, you jeopardize the whole process and slow down your progress.

You may face many frustrations during your learning process. However, don’t give up. Keep on trying out new ideas that you had picked up. Keep doing those that work and kick away ideas that don’t work.

There is a short cut to this process. Get yourself a mentor or a coach. Whether you want to lose weight or start your own online business, a mentor who has been there can help you move faster towards your goal.

Since they had already reached where you want to be, they will know about the challenges that you will face and what will work for you. Borrow their knowledge and you will achieve your goals in a much shorter amount of time.

If you decide to make a difference to your life, I challenge you to take action now. Start planning for your goals. Make this year your best year ever. Will you take up the challenge?

Vincent teaches you how to Unleash Your Maximum Potential and live life on your own terms. He blogs at HealthMoneysuccess.com and you can visit him and find out more information on how to wake sleeping genius within you.

If you want to fly a plane, learn to fly kite #MondayInspiration

Gabriel Olatunji Legend



Too many hypocrites in our world today; too many people living a lie; too many people wanting what they cannot have; too many people looking for what is not lost; and too many people living as though they will die today. I don’t intend to keep you in the dark concerning my thoughts this Monday morning but this foundation is necessary before divulging the coming truths.



“It’s been a while I saw him and when we met at an event recently we exchanged pleasantries and inquired of each other’s well-being. I explained to him about how I now run a small business which has been very challenging but we are moving closer to greater breakthroughs. It was my friend’s turn, he was about to organize a paid conference and according to him he is expecting 25 000 people. I was wowed and I thought there must be a grand plan on ground and he must have been organizing conferences long before now but to my amazement this new idea is the first he is organizing; he had only been organizing other ones in his mind. What a high level of hypocrisy.”



Young people are supposed to have great dreams but great dreams does not equal to stupidity and foolishness. ‘Who among you wants to build a tower but does not first sit down to count the cost?’ The height of foolishness and stupidity is when you have a dream to fly a plane but failed to start learning from the elementary stages; you have been billed to crash. If you want to fly a plane some day, learn to fly kite today.

Abraham Lincoln was faced with defeat throughout his life. He lost eight elections, failed twice in business and suffered a nervous breakdown but still emerged as the President of the United States of America. Here’s a look at his failures in life before elected President;

1816 - His family was forced out of their home. He had to work to support them.

1818 - His mother died.

1831 - Failed in business.

1832 - Ran for state legislature - lost.

1832 - Also lost his job - wanted to go to law school but couldn't get in.

1833 - Borrowed some money from a friend to begin a business and by the end of the year he was bankrupt. He spent the next 17 years of his life paying off this debt.

1834 - Ran for state legislature again - won.

1835 - Was engaged to be married, sweetheart died and his heart was broken.

1836 - Had a total nervous breakdown and was in bed for six months.

1838 - Sought to become speaker of the state legislature - defeated.

1840 - Sought to become elector - defeated.

1843 - Ran for Congress - lost.

1846 - Ran for Congress again - this time he won - went to Washington and did a good job.

1848 - Ran for re-election to Congress - lost.

1849 - Sought the job of land officer in his home state - rejected.

1854 - Ran for Senate of the United States - lost.

1856 - Sought the Vice-Presidential nomination at his party's national convention - get less than 100 votes.

1858 - Ran for U.S. Senate again - again he lost.

1860 - Elected president of the United States.



This is my resolve, you may have a dream of owning a TV station some day; start with owning a blog or a YouTube channel. You may have a dream to become the richest man tomorrow; start by saving the seemingly little extra income you have today. You may have a dream to be a top fashion designer with boutiques in all the states of the federation; start by sewing for your family members, your friends, neighbors and so on. You may have a dream to organize a conference that will have one million people in attendance; start by organizing a meeting of ten, then hundred. You may have a dream to become a global champion; start by championing your locality. It is the accumulated little drops of water that makes a mighty ocean eventually – start with your size now but never remain on the same spot twice.



Gabriel Olatunji ‘Legend’ tweets from @OLATUNJISPEAKS

OLATUNJISPEAKS.com is your ONLY Inspirational website

I am not a Millionaire but a Multi-Billionaire - FuntoOni, 'Beautified' Author

Gabriel Olatunji 'Legend'

[caption id="attachment_315" align="aligncenter" width="200"] Funto Oni[/caption]

In a fun chat with the beautified one, the author of the classic beauty book, 'Beautified'; the co-founder of LACE Royal and the CEO of Beautified Concept, a beauty firm that not only beautify faces but beautify lives. Funto Oni bares it all in this chat with Gabriel Olatunji 'Legend'.

She talks about the death of her father, her book launch, relationship status and her financial strength; this is an interview that will propel you forward. Enjoy!



Your name is fast becoming a brand among young people. How did you get here?



Honestly, I can't say it's because of anything magnificent I've done. It's just a simple decision I made a few years ago to have fun, fulfill purpose and add value to lives of people around me. I try to do all three in my everyday life and maybe that's how I got here.



Have fun, fulfill purpose and add value, can you expatiate further?



I think that's very simple. Whatever I do, I make sure it’s fun; I love to play, laugh and just have fun; I don't take life too seriously and I really believe having fun should be a priority in the life of anyone who wants better health, greater happiness and less stress. Fulfilling purpose is about finding out what exactly God's will for my life is and seeking His direction per time; its different from being ambitious and having my own goals and vision different from what God wants me to do; so at every point, I'm asking "God is this your will for me?" or "What would you have me do, Lord?"; adding value to people is about being there when they need you, helping them achieve their goals; giving a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on and just being a good friend. Like they say, "people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"



That's profound. You launched a book recently and you have also been an inspirational figure on Twitter, what are you doing that other young people are not doing?



Yes I launched my first book 'Beautified' in August and the responses and feedback have been great so far, thank God. At being an inspirational figure on twitter, well, I've been doing all the three things I listed above - Having fun, fulfilling purpose and adding value to people. I am just being me. I don't try to be like anybody; like I always say, even though my number one role model is Michelle Obama, I don't want to be the next Michelle Obama; I want to be the first Funto Oni. A lot of young people need to learn to be themselves and not try to copy or be like anybody else, that's the only way they can really stand out and be unique.



How many copies of your book has been sold and is it true that you raked in millions from your launch?



Millions? (Laughter) Hmmm! Amen! Well, so far just about 200 copies have been sold. I've not really had the time to focus fully on the sales but its moving slow and steady. I'm working towards selling much more by the end of the year, by God's grace.



[caption id="attachment_317" align="aligncenter" width="300"] 'BEAUTIFIED' FRONT COVER[/caption]

And a copy goes for how much?



#2500 naira initially, however, my publisher and I have agreed to drop the price by 40% even though that's not even up to the cost price.



What other things do you do apart from being an author?



Apart from being an author I'm a chartered accountant. Used to work as an accountant till I decided it was boring and wanted to do something more; then I got a job as an Executive Assistant but resigned two weeks ago. I dint like the work environment and I wasn't having as much fun on the job; right now after taking time out to seek God's face for direction, I've gotten ideas I'm currently working on; I do makeup for bridal, television and runway; also, I'm the co-founder of LACE (Ladies After Christ's Example) a Faith-based club for young ladies between the ages of 13-19 centered on reviving, renewing and rejuvenating the spirit, mind and body of young teenagers through informal gatherings, meetings, and outings. We've had about four events this year and we're planning our end of year concert in December.



Would it be safe to assume that you have been able to command respect and fulfill your dreams because you had rich parents or because you attended Covenant University?



Lol! That will be very unsafe. Rich parents? Well not exactly.  We were quite comfortable as a family, my dad was going to get me my first car when I was in 300 level but he died when I was in 200 level. From then till now, it has simply been God's grace. I can say attending Covenant University was one of the best things that happened to me because that gave me the foundation for being who I am and who I'm destined to be. I'm a very proud alumnus of CU and daughter of Bishop Oyedepo.



Would you say you are successful?



I don't think I have even started yet. Success is not a destination you arrive at; it's a journey and I hope I never 'arrive'.



What is the difference between success and greatness?



Success I think in one way or the other is about getting results; it has to do with status and money while greatness is about fulfilling purpose and leaving a positive mark in your generation and beyond.



Are you a millionaire?



No. I'm a multi-billionaire; I know it in my heart. Only a matter of time, it will be evident for all to see.



Five things to do to move from survival to greatness?



1. Surround yourself with people who are doing great things; they say you're the average of five people you surround yourself with.



2. Work hard to be the very best at whatever it is you do. There will be so many people doing the same thing, do your best to stand out.



3. Let excellence be a habit in all that you do. God is not glorified by your being mediocre and playing small, He's glorified by the excellence portrayed in the works of your hands.



4. Forget about money and focus on adding value; when you give people value, money will surely come. Money flows in the direction of value.



5. Serve God! That's the surest way to greatness - Deuteronomy 8:18



Hmmm! You come across as a born again christian?



Yes! I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ :D #unashamed



Has it always been this rosy for you? What is the challenges life has thrown at you?



Life is full of challenges and I've had my fair share. It hasn't been rosy but God has been so faithful. There were times I cried all night; prayed all night; felt like giving up. It’s just been God's grace all through and I get better through every challenge. Losing my dad was really challenging for me, it came like a shock because he was still very young. He was just 40 years old. I was on a first class in school then, but I was so down, I dropped to a second class upper. I think I cried all night for about two weeks; I was just getting close to my dad so it was hard to absorb the reality that he was gone. And I didn’t even get to see him; I was in school when he died. Life after that really changed. That's when you know the true color of some family members - but God has been faithful.



How old are you? In all of these years what are the notable things you have been able to achieve in your life?



I'm 23 years old; sometimes I feel like I’m too old. Becoming a chartered accountant, publishing a book; co-founding LACE; running a beauty firm would be few of my notable achievements at the moment. Soon I'd be taking over the beauty industry.



What's the name of your beauty firm and who are those you have serviced?



It used to be Hadassah Creations, but we are rebranding to Beautified Concepts. It’s not just about beautifying faces but also about beautifying lives.



Mention 10 worthy role models for young people in Nigeria?



(Thinking) Steve Harris, Fela and Tara Durotoye; Toyosi Akerele; Lanre Olusola; Jumoke Adenowo; Oby Ezekwesi; Ndi Okereke; Kunle Soriyan; Alibaba; Olu Jacobs and Joke Silva;



What will you be doing 10 years from now?



Ten years from now, I'd be having more fun, adding more value, making more money; helping others achieve greatness; publishing bestselling books; inspiring and beautifying more lives globally... Before ten years, I'd be recognized by TIME Magazine as the most inspiring woman.



Are you in a relationship? What does it take to keep a man for life? And when will the wedding bell be ringing?



Yes I'm in a relationship. First, it takes the grace of God and the help of the Holyspirit to keep a relationship for life; then a lot of selflessness, compromise and sacrifice. Wedding bells will be ringing soon and you'd definitely hear when they ring.



Someone somewhere will love to achieve the level of success you have been able to command. Steps to making that happen?



Trust God, be yourself and just do it!



Thank you very much for your time Funto.



You're very much welcome

Follow Funto Oni on Twitter @funtoonie



Follow us for more inspirational interviews and articles; On Twitter @OLATUNJISPEAKS | On Facebook www.facebook.com/olatunjispeaks |