I had an interesting conversation with a beautiful young woman some time ago where she told me the qualities her type of man must possess. She said he must be God-fearing, intelligent, making money and about four other things my mind cannot remember. I was impressed; she knows what she wants in a man, which will make it difficult for a man who is not her type to sway her off. The problem with most of us is that we do not have a CLEAR-CUT picture of the type of man or woman we want to spend the rest of our lives with – if we do we will not date just anybody – that picture of the man you have decided in your heart and on paper (write it out) will be the deciding factor in knowing whether to say Yes or No to an opposite sex; it shouldn’t be his or her looks or one of the most common reason young people say yes to each other these days, ‘He/she’s a really nice person’.
You cannot to make a life-altering decision like that on a flimsy disposition of the person interested in you, you have to make an accurate assessment and be sure you are going to end up in the same place in future. I digressed. After listening to the beautiful young woman I mentioned earlier, I said to her, ‘These are great things to look for in a man and let’s assume you find a man who brings all these to the table, what are you (the lady) going to be bringing to the table?’ She responded immediately with a shocker, ‘I have never thought about that before in my life’.
The lady is just like many of us; we desire to have the most beautiful woman, with shape and curve, curly hair and has a British accent but we have failed to ask ourselves the all-important question, ‘what will I be bringing to the table should I get these type of woman?’ You cannot be asking for a sexy woman when you go about with pot-belly. How can you look forward to marry the woman with a curly hair when you have not barbed or shaved for God-so-many-forgotten months? What is good for the goose is good for the gander.
I want you to change your outlook today. Instead of you asking for a perfect man or woman focus on making yourself the perfect partner. List out all the qualities you would love in your spouse and one after the other tick the ones you have and set a goal to imbibe the ones you don’t have. You attract what you deserve, not what you wish for in life.
Lastly for women, your boyfriend is not your source of income; he should spend on you but in a limited capacity because he is not your father. Don’t ask for a man who can take care of your responsibilities, ask yourself if you have become the woman who will not be a financial burden to her man – that is when you have grown and can confidently beat your chest that you are an asset to him and not a liability. When was the last time you bought him something? Same goes for the men but more for the women. *runs away**
What other things aside these are you bringing to the table in your relationship or marriage? Write them in the comment section below.
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